It was snowing very early in the season.
Meera hated the snow. For some reason it kept reminding her of the trail of blatant red her drunk mother had left in the white lawn before she had placed herself in the way of the speeding bus. Everything else had blotted out.
Winters and snow had meant she’d be drinking in, and the neighbours witnessing her departure to her place in fair weather with her bottle in hand, spilling along the way.
This was their first Christmas without her. Her and her aunt’s. It took little for her aunt to burst into tears but Meera was secretly glad. Truth be told she didn’t miss the woman who had died. The mother she had loved had died long before that.
Meera silently decorated the tree bringing out the dusty ornaments that hadn’t been used for almost ten years. Her aunt was sitting by herself by the window alternately looking at the snow, and the photograph of her dead sister in her hand.
“She loved the snow, you remember”, she said.
Meera mumbled something incomprehensible. Her aunt didn’t notice.
“It meant that her Meera and she had to go out into the snow, tussle and fight and roll around”, she had a faraway look in her eyes, smiling at a stray memory of the past.
Meera froze in her act of hanging the mistle-toe. She didn’t want to think of the first snow. That it used to be the best time of the year. For her and her mother.
“Cathy, I don’t want to talk about her. Please, Cathy. Don’t. Why don’t you snap out of it? It’s been a year for God’s sake. Get out of it!”
With every syllable uttered Meera got angrier, “I don’t miss her for one bit. She didn’t when she started drinking. She didn’t when I came away to live with you.”
As expected her aunt started to cry.
Meera sighed. She should have known better than to harp on that again.
She went to her aunt and crouched in front of her, “I’m sorry, Cathy. I know it hurts you that I didn’t love her, and that I don’t miss her. But I do wonder what she did to deserve so much loyalty from you?” She added with a derisive laugh.
Cathy looked up, her eyes glinting.
“She gave me back you.”
“What are you talking about?”
“What are you talking about?”
Her eyes were blazing, Meera saw, not from tears but rage and something else.
“She gave me my daughter.”
Guilt. And Remorse.
“I had you when having an illegitimate child still meant living in the dumps, shunned from the society. My sister hid the truth and me from prying eyes, and away from me killing either you or myself. She gave you a place in the society as her own daughter, loved you as such, and let me have you, too”.
Her eyes flashed but her lips quivered, “What do you call that?”
Meera was transfixed. She stared into her aunt’s face seeing nothing.
She was illegitimate. The mother she had known wasn’t her real mother. She couldn’t grasp it. She looked into her aunt’s face. No, not her aunt, her mother. Her biological mother.
She stood up abruptly, and shook her head as if to clear it.
“Well, she didn’t do a good job after all. I had to fend for myself. The semblance of a family I had was taken away from me. The drunk mother.”
She turned to leave.
“Yes, the drunk mother.” Cathy replied softly, looking down, “Who came to learn that her husband had fathered her sister’s child. Who was hurt and betrayed by every person she had loved. Whose daughter, the centre of her life, albeit unknowingly, chose her biological mother over her… Yes, she was only human.
“It is Christmas-time now but her Christmas was only ever with you. You were her family. God, how the two of you loved the first snow.”
N.B. I understand you may not at all like this piece. But I am writing after a long-long-long time. Just felt like getting off the mark, anew being less choosy and less critical, taking head-on the block that has developed in my mind, that keeps telling me I can’t write worth shit. Whatever your opinions and inputs, however, I gladly value them. Love, G.:)
can I tell u something? I felt as if I was reading a post written by me…i swear, trust me…this is how I write..my language, the kinda story I would have written, the narration, the flow – it's all like Neha ditto..
now it's upto you how you take this comment..
and I feel don't publish this comment..nobody else will understand why I am saying this; but each word is true..:)
Good one girl 🙂 Glad to read one of yours after such a long time!
Super story. Double suspense. I loved it. The picture reminds me of the few years we spent in Salt Lake City….that is Salt Lake City, Utah.
It was nice to see a Nota Bene 🙂 ; haven't seen that guy in a long while !
It was a very good story. Did not see the end coming. Once at the end I was thinking 'Damn ! She beat me to it..', I had been thinking of writing something on Jack Nicholson's early life that has similar parallels..
hey this is pretty nice story…interesting…also..
the turning point could be written better..:D
block?What block?You need to rethink.
I TOTALLY loved it,the narration could be smoother,but hell you made it up with such an awesome story.I almost cried towards the end.What a sap!
Rusty?You?Gotta be kidding.THAT WAS AWESOME.
Okay I'll stop now.
P.s:I LOVED IT!
hi a nice story.. but could have been a lil bigger… it all went too fast.. could have dwelt on the characters more..
but it was a good concised story…
will be back for more…
I love your stories, and you know it. 🙂 This one was very beautiful just like others that you have penned.
I wonder how you create such twists.
Anyways, merry Christmas. 🙂
Whatever made you write that nota bene!
It was a fine story.
Can't expect a twist in the end when the story is dealing with such intense emotions, but you've done an exemplary job. Kudos!
And the narration is as good as always. 🙂
Neha: You can't possibly have an idea how much that comment means to me. I'm sorry I published the comment by mistake, Thank You for letting me keep it.
Avada: Thanks girl, next time I really don't want to miss being a writer at your place.
SG: Good to see here… Thank you! 🙂 🙂
Madhu: I'm more of a N.B. person than a P.S. one. Well, I wrote the story with just the first two lines in my head, the rest happened… I've no idea as to how good or bad or twisted the ending is, honestly! 😛
And I always manage to write a long comment to you! 🙂
Sid: Thanks! But there was no 'turning point' as such! 😛
Miss_Nobody: Hey girl! You are always too effusive with your words. But I love it!! 😀
By the way, am sorry I just couldn't visit your blog, but will do soon.
Thanks! And as for the narration, I'll try to make it better! 🙂 🙂
Roshmi: Thanks dearie! 🙂
Tanmaya: Thanks girl! Actually I enjoy writing simple stories, not elaborate it too much so that a lot can be left to the reader's imagination, and make him think. Going into details about the characters takes away the simplicity. Appreciate your insight and will try to implement next time surely. 🙂
Shilpa: I have no idea how the story came along seriously but honestly, I am very bad at twists! But thanks for saying u love my stories… I love urs too, and u know that! 🙂 🙂
Karthink: I was hoping for you to read this one 'cause you are an amazing story writer yourself and your words mean a lot, thanks! 🙂
As for the N.B., some things have blocked my head, I'm trying to fight over those, so no matter even if I have to start afresh from the lowest rung! 🙂
ohh boy.. that was touching… loved the story line… such deep emotions it portray…
very beautifully described.
Forgot to tell you, incidentally I have a story line in my head inspired by a character Jack Nicholson played in a movie. No resemblance to the movie itself or its storyline but borrowing the character history.
For bringing some good cheer, clear and loud for the festive season! 🙂 🙂
Warm wishes, Guria.
Thank you dear! That you could understand/feel the deep emotions though unsaid but implied… you warm my heart! Thanks again! 🙂
Warm wishes, Guria.
He is one bastard who's never dull no matter what the movie ! Meant the above with respect.
Incidentally watching his movie as I type and is he good — my 20th time or so watching this one and it's not for Demi Moore or Tom Cruise (though they have done well too) !
On your piece, I can't wait ! Will haunt your blog 🙂
Hey der! long time, huh! 🙂
wonderfully written piece….luvd da flow nd admired the situation that was concocted…emotions, a lil shock value and an apt description of the circumstance! Trademark Guria! 🙂
<3 it! keep writing! tc! :)
If you call this a work after writers block… then i forever am i in :P.
It was really good :)!
Merry Christmas 🙂
I always expect something better whenever I come to MM. But to be candid, this piece failed to please the standards set by you..
but then, as you said, its just the block period…
got me goin there really!! sry for not being frequent lately…merry xmas!
i am finally back…..
Whoa, someone's block is surely giving them a good run of year-end twists eh?
Good work G.
I shall make you wait! 🙂
But try and guess which movie thge character is from when I do write okk? 🙂
Yeah, long time! Thanks for liking this. Your stamp always qualifies it as good! Thank you!
Why don't I ask you everytime that I can't write! Thank you so much girlie! 🙂 🙂
Sorry to disappoint you buddy!
Thanks so much!! 🙂
Merry Xmas to you, too!
Good to see you! And thank you! 🙂
Welcome back, Sir!!
Thank you! Now go and write something! 😛 😀
You think?! Wow, I must be good! Thanks a ton! Do come back even when there's lack of twists! 😀
Merry Christams everyone! And a Happy and a Lucky New Year too!
Lots of warm wishes and warm clothes and many pints to you!
tanha humne gujari hai bohut ratein
unhe bohut ujr tha zindagi pe
ashq dhua ho gaye tapish mien, jab
pata chala,” woh aag dariya mien baithe the”
ha,thats okay!I just say what I mean.Scout's honour.
OH,I wasn't one. 😛
would love to see you back on my blog!
Wish you a wonderful year ahead…!
Very interesting story. And what twists. Liked it. :))
I think a lot… anyway, that nothing post would have been interesting if it stayed… I'll keep visiting often, I like this blog.
The only thing I di not like about this story was the note at the end.
The need for approval is the fundamental problem for a writers block. You need to write what you need to write.Period.Whether people like it or not is immaterial.
The more defensive you are in the mind the more difficult you ll find to continue writing solid stuff.
So follow the rule – SWSWSWN
some will, some wont ,so what's next ?
OKAY .. is all I can say .. I loved ur posts coz of that implied humor .. !
Anyways happy new year .. and wish it takes off ur block 🙂
Keep the comment if u want, I know it ain't a nice one 😐
Where are you???….i hope you are well…..very well.
my blog does not feel the same without our comments…….
Hope you are just fine…….
is there anybody in this blog????
I know its yes…..maybe she is busy…..maybe she is just playing games….anyways…i wish her all the best in what ever she is doing……
Its just that…..blogging life is not same anymore….
hey nice one.. though i really had to refer the dictionary for a few words… 😀
Aap bahut chup hai ji aaj kal 🙂