55-Fiction #3

I am not much fond of 55-fiction as it limits my scope and truthfully, I’m not good at it. This 55-er that you are about to read was not written as a 55 but coincidentally became one. It is very different from the usual reads, and doesn’t follow any of the rules except it is of 55 words (exactly). Bharathi’s posts about questioning were an inspiration for the idea. And as the header goes, you understand that this is a question. A profound one. Of practises, of beliefs, of faith and of misuse.

Religion?

“Mercy!”, he screamed. “Mercy! Mercy!”
With a silver knife, he slashed his hands, his feet as he screamed. The bloodied whip lay at his feet, its evidence prominent in the glittering red tracks it had left on his back!
“Penance! I’m paying my penance!! Penance for my birth!” He screamed on.
The altar stared, unmoved.
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About Guria

An Artist in Science - I am a Misfit 'cause I choose to be one. "Whenever you find that you are on the side of the majority, it is time to reform" And I am a Maverick, because, I'm... umm... brilliant?
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20 Responses to 55-Fiction #3

  1. HaRy!! says:

    well yu did it well finally didnt yu!

    Like

  2. pawan says:

    I didn't quite understand the concept, the last part that is, but the narrative reminded me of Silas from The Da Vinci Code, don't you think so?

    Like

  3. A responsible and sensible post.

    Being am Agnostic and Anthropologist who prefers rationality and logic, i did connect to the post in the best possible way. Frankly, no questions. Because it is clear, naked and truth.
    Devotion is a state of mind. A gene in our body is responsible for the belief in some supernatural power. Anyways, i would like to read more posts which focus on sociology and humanities.
    Great attempt….

    Coming to the rules of 55 fiction. I support you in this regard(no rules etc). 55 fiction is a means to reach the end and not an end in itself.

    I may start more 55ers because i got a friend now
    Keep expressing 🙂

    cheers,
    mahesh

    Like

  4. Just one simile… ” :O “!!!

    Like

  5. Ravan says:

    Aila…this is a little tense topic…
    although my dear too much 'he' so confusion how many people are exactly present…

    But still…its painful!!

    Like

  6. Ravan says:

    I hope I am the first…wat r d chances!!

    Like

  7. hi Guria,

    that is a hearty concept and 55W has come out very nicely..well done..

    Like

  8. Guria says:

    Hey HaRy

    Yeah, it seems I did okay!
    Thanks! 🙂

    Hey Pawan

    The description is a generalised one, that you won't only find in The Da Vinci's Code but several other fiction and non-fiction because it was a practise among a set of a religion. My major observation/contribution was the last line.

    Hey Mahesh

    I am glad you understood the post. I have a knack of not explaining things fully as I like readers to think and understand. But my language needs to be strong for that. 😀
    Can he reach God this way, the way he has been brainwashed to follow? That was what I tried asking here. Thanks! 🙂

    Hey Schrei

    So that simile means, “What the heck is this?! #$#@%%^!!” or “Wow!” Tell me if it is not the latter!! 😀

    Hey Priyan

    Welcome to MM! And thanks so much for the follow! 🙂
    And thanks for appreciating my effort!:)

    Hey Ravan

    Chances were good, so seems you were not lucky this time! Try your luck next time, I am sure you will be first! 😀
    Hmm, the number of 'he'-s are indeed confusing! Oh, by the way, there are two you-s in the above two sentences, both are to you, Ravan! 😉

    Hey Pramoda

    You think?? 🙂
    Thanks, girlie!!

    Like

  9. Shruti says:

    Sreya, this is a strong, vibrant and a poignant 55er from you. Even I felt like Da Vinci code at first. But when I read the comments, Pawan reflected my thoughts and I saw ur explanation as well!

    Cheers

    Like

  10. soin says:

    the altar dint move coz it never asked for it and hence wont take the blame..free

    Like

  11. BK Chowla says:

    To be honest with you,I did not understand the post.
    However,I see no reason as to why will it not be a good post

    Like

  12. Sorcerer says:

    that was cool in 55 words!!

    Like

  13. As a first timer, You did an attempt and kudos to that.

    55F is about writing something that ends with a punch. I think it does most of the times..

    Its a nice attempt though i felt it needs improvement subject wise 🙂

    Do sneak at my blog for 55F, you may understand what i am trying to say and yeah i don't say i am master of it.

    I am just a budding blogger 🙂

    See you around 🙂

    Cheers
    Mahesh

    Like

  14. Bharathi says:

    Many felt like Da vinci code, I felt like scratching my head :D. Jus kidding.

    Honestly I didnt understand when I read it once. After readin several times along with your comment, I got it. The mistake is not yours, I am a big dumbo in understanding 55ers :-).

    I always like articles with societal concept. Good one.

    Keep writing.

    Like

  15. Miss_Nobody says:

    Good going 🙂 Nice first attempt :)And thanks for following!

    Like

  16. I'd be lying if I did not jump to Silas with the chalice when I read. But on a deeper note, like you describe in comments, parallels are everywhere

    Like

  17. Guria says:

    Hey Shruti

    I actually didn't write with Da Vinci Code in mind but it is similar, yes!
    I am glad you gave me your stamp of approval, means this one has passed! after all, you are the Queen!! 😉 😀

    Hey Soin

    Someone did get it perfectly!! Err, I'm not sure it is about the blame, though! 😀

    Hello BK Chowla-ji

    It's okay, Sir! I hope the comments will help you understand.

    Hi Sorcerer

    Welcome to MM. Thanks 🙂

    Heyy Mr. Pramathesh™ Borkotoky

    Rationalism? Is it? 🙂

    Hi Mahesh Sindbandge

    Welcome to MM. 🙂
    You are welcome to try the subject as a 55 on your blog. Do drop me a line when you do. 🙂
    And thanks.

    Hey Bharathi

    Yeah, either one of us is the dumbo. And by the consensus, it seems I am the one! 😀
    It is probably my fault because I am not to fond of describing a lot, and let it depend a lot on the reader. 😛 🙂
    But, thanks 🙂

    Hi Miss_Nobody

    Thanks 🙂 And as for the follow, don't thank me, I love good blogs and to crown it all, a fellow Benglai!! How could I not?? 😀

    Hi Madhu

    Thanks and doubled, for having patience with this Maverick, and coming back! 😀

    Like

  18. Insignia says:

    I read the last line more than 5 times. I wanted to make sure I got it. 😀 yes i got that.

    Religion; but no one ever asked for his penance!!!

    Like

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