You wanna get married???

Excerpts from men who have already used the product “marriage”. Read on and at least try to glean some knowledge, Men! And all the women, read on and have a laugh!
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  1. I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry.
    That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.
    David Bissonette
  2. When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
    Sacha Guitry

  3. After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can’t face each other, but still they stay together.
    Hemant Joshi
  4. By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. If you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher. Socrates
  5. Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.
    Dumas
  6. The great question… which I have not been able to answer… is, “What does a woman want?
    Sigmund Freud
  7. I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
    Anonymous
  8. “Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.”
    Henny Youngman
  9. “I don’t worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.”
    Sam Kinison
  10. “There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It’s called marriage.”
    James Holt McGavran
  11. “I’ve had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn’t.”
    Patrick Murray
  12. Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming
    1. Whenever you’re wrong, admit it,
    2. Whenever you’re right, shut up.
    Nash
  13. The most effective way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once…
    Anonymous
  14. You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
    Henny Youngman
  15. My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
    Rodney Dangerfield
  16. A good wife always forgives her husband when she’s wrong.
    Milton Berle
  17. Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy.
    Anonymous
  18. A man inserted an ‘ad’ in the classifieds: “Wife wanted”. Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: “You can have mine.”
    Anonymous
  19. First Guy (proudly): “My wife’s an angel!”
    Second Guy: “You’re lucky, mine’s still alive.”

Which leads me to believe that men are actually very dumb, even after knowing all this, they are the first to jump the wagon! When will you finally learn to stop following us around???!!

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(N.B. The quotes were taken from a popular fun forwarded email, which is too good not to be shared, though i must confess i did change the context of use!)

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About Guria

An Artist in Science - I am a Misfit 'cause I choose to be one. "Whenever you find that you are on the side of the majority, it is time to reform" And I am a Maverick, because, I'm... umm... brilliant?
This entry was posted in Friends, Laughs. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to You wanna get married???

  1. not all men are dumb…some prefer to stay bachelors!!!!!!!!

    Like

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