Tired and Unimpressed

Well, I am impressed! I just found out a solution to all those fairness creams we advertise. Yes, you heard me right, I, indeed, have semi-discovered the secret to being fair- just travel West!

After two flights across most oceans (not the Pacific, thank gawd!), I realized being fair is a cakewalk. A first-class airline, of course with cattle-class seats, with the untimely, ungodly, terrible tasting fried food that they serve is sure to give you a nice, jittery and overly-buttery feeling in your stomach (that’s why they keep their toilets so beautifully clean as whatever else you may not visit, that you surely will!) that makes you have an even more uncomfortable sleep, and an even less inclination to eat anymore. So, in all your face develops a pasty look, over the 24+ hours period. Add to that the changing time-frame. Set your watch as many times as you want, suddenly you’ll forget what and which time your damned watch is showing! So, your face gets drained of blood, and not much nutrition reaches your brain, and lo! you are a tone fairer in 24 hours!

But that’s not all. I can make you fairer even still.

Chapped lips that seem pink (now how did that happen?!), a weak sun that shines brightly but erm, aren’t you also supposed to be hot? Flushed face, every time you’ll land that’s a common colour, that makes you pink, a colour you dream of when you dream of those blue-eyed eye candies, and sometimes the face completely drained of colour when you look at a the price of a bottled water. Of course, if you don’t know the golden rule of not multiplying every dollar you spend with 45, 47 or even 50. But well, you still might. Baser pleasures, you see.

And you think you look horrid, till you reach the mirror and see whoa! you are pretty?!*%!#@*#$!!??

Wonder what would have happened if you were born in the West then? Hellooo, melanin-lack! 

The Chronicle 

Two boring and uneventful flights. Though I dunno what I mean by the last but yeah, on hindsight I am glad it was uneventful. Terrible food too. Landed at the correct time and I lifted all three pieces of luggage by myself. Met, and chatted throughout the flight, a 21-year old Chennai engineer going for his MS to another campus of the same university. He was really nice and very chatty.The shuttle-ride was cool too. Got a van from a limousine service. Sigh! Glimpsed a few cool cars all driven by oldies (is this what the world’s coming to?!). Made several international calls, emailed most who’d be anxious. I was so tired that I had to forgo a complimentary dinner in the ultra-expensive hotel. I know I am gonna regret that but I’ll save it for later. My awesome seniors got me food, and I survived on that. The hotel room is actually a suite, liked it! Spent $5.75 today to buy junk food. The damn 25cents coin that the girl returned only has etchings and drawings on both sides of the coin, and the words ‘QUARTER DOLLAR’ just printed below on one-side. I dunno, but would it have been too much to etch the number too? Yeah, i am grumpy. But I have got M&M and a fat bottle of Pepsi!! Been Skype-ing all night and day. Feeling a lot better after that. Right now, I am waiting for my roomy to arrive… It will be much, much better after she’s here. I have a partiality for Mumbai girls.

Don’t ever expect such detailed chronicling again in your lifetime. It’s just that I have complimentary high-speed internet, a sluggish brain, everyone in my friend’s list sleeping (half past four in the morning in India) and a lot of free time that I am writing what I am writing.

Oh, and there’s no place like India in the whole, wide world. Darn it!

(Days# 1 and 2)

N.B. I am just going out to dinner to mys enior’s place. See you with a wittier post next time. Smiles, G. 🙂

About Guria

An Artist in Science: A Misfit 'cause I choose to be one. "Whenever you find that you are on the side of the majority, it is time to reform" And a Maverick, because, I'm... umm... brilliant?
This entry was posted in Laughs, Observer, The Other Side of the River. Bookmark the permalink.

8 Responses to Tired and Unimpressed

  1. Maverick says:


    dats sum catharsis! 😛

    tc alright! 🙂


  2. Neha says:

    take care girl..it is always nice to hear from you thru different mediums..

    – Mumbai Girl 😉


  3. Harini says:

    Different time zones :(. Take care of yourself. And keep in touch 🙂


  4. Aditya says:

    Hey cool. Where are you now and doing what? 🙂


  5. All the best! 🙂

    And come back fairer! :p


  6. 🙂 good to see you reached and dint have trouble. The first time we go something weird happens, like I got lost in an airport 😛 Hehe.. Good luck G and keep in touch 🙂


  7. aativas says:

    Hope you would enjoy your stay there..


  8. Bikramjit says:

    excelent well said there is indeed no place like india.. after all its HOME…

    all the best I hope you settle down as soon and have tons of funnnn Take care and be goood 🙂


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